Specialist vs Mainstream

Is it as simple as one vs the other?

When it comes to education for our children, we all want what is best for them. When it comes to the time of year to select what primary or secondary school we would like our children to attend, we all take it seriously, right? We go to the open evenings, compare what school fits our child best and submit our choices with hope that our child gets a place in our number one school. But when it comes to our children who have additional needs, it becomes a little bit more complex. We must consider all the same things other parents do plus a whole lot more. Does the school have SEND provision? Are they able to cope with our child’s needs? Will our child feel comfortable in this environment? What are the sizes of the class? Is 1:1 support available here? Do they have speech and language? Do they have any sensory areas? The list goes on and on. As parents, we may already know that mainstream schools are just not suited for our child but does that automatically mean that so is specialist? It is not one size fits all with any child in education, never mind a chid with additional needs and we all know that getting a child a place in specialist school is not an easy fix. With lack of funding, lack of schools and lack of school places in specialist provision, it is a fight just to even have a place considered.

I have briefly touched on the mainstream school that Billie currently attends. She loves it … I love it! She has formed friendships, she has a 1:1 who she loves and the school really have pulled out all the stops to ensure Billie is comfortable and has access to things she may need to get her through the day ... not to mention how well Billie has progressed academically since she started reception in September. However, as Billie progresses through the school, this may change. In the last meeting I had with the schools SENCO, it was suggested to me that Billie may not be able to progress much further than year 1 at that school and they are also considering making changes for Billie next year such as holding her back in reception or having her move up with her friends to year 1 but ultimately pulling her out of the lessons as she may not cope with the academic side as well as the environment she will be in from year 1. We all know there is a huge jump from reception to year 1. It is more academic- less learn through play and the classroom will be laid out as tables and chairs rather than a more fun learning environment. Billie won’t have access to her own sensory room, nor will she have as much free rein to choose how she takes part in the lesson. This doesn’t come as a huge surprise to me or my husband as we always knew at some point, Billie’s place in mainstream school will be questioned. The SENCO suggested that we go and have a look around specialist provision so we have an idea on Billie’s possible future, so this week, that is what we are doing. My only question with this is ….. What if specialist isn’t the right fit for her either?

I don’t have a concrete opinion on specialist provision as I have never had experience with one, but I do know my child and I truly don’t know if it is the right fit for her. As I’ve said multiple times, not all children with additional needs are the same and although Billie has some solid, obvious traits of ASD, she doesn’t have them all. She doesn’t have behavioural issues in school nor does she have many meltdowns and I worry that if she is placed in an environment with children who do have these traits, how that will impact Billie. She gets triggered by loud noises, cries, shouting, angry outbursts and I wonder if she is around this each day, how that will affect her mood and her opinion of school. She currently associates school with happiness, like I say, she really enjoys going and I worry that if she starts to feel unhappy in a school, will this change, and will I then enter the struggle that so many parents go through each day of getting my child to go to school at all. I don’t want anyone reading this who has an association with specialist provision to think I’m being judgy or opinionated on a subject I don’t now to much about because that is absolutely not my intention but I’m trying to figure out what is best for my child. On Thursday evening, I am going to look around a specialist provision in my local area so I’m hoping this will give me more clarity on the situation. I mean, lets face it, just because the school may recommend a specialist provision, doesn’t even mean billie will get a place. But, we are just following recommendations that have been given to us and it will be nice knowing all that we can about what Billies future may look like. You can’t go wrong with having as such information as possible, can you?

If it was my choice, I would love Billie to be able to stay where she is for as long as she possibly can. Ultimately, her happiness is what comes before anything academic, but the reality is that mainstream schools are underfunded and SEN children can not always be accommodated. If there isn’t budget to buy essentials such as glue and pens, then there certainly isn’t going to be the budget for SEN children …. Regardless of what some people may think!

I have seen so many mixed opinions of parents whose children either are currently in or have been in my exact position. If I allow myself, I could drive myself crazy thinking and worrying about Billies future but when so much of this issue is completely out of my control there isn’t much else I can do than try and take control of what I can and just take each day at a time. Starting with this Thursday, going to view a local specialist school and come up with my own opinion and go from there. The next step will be to address Billies situation for year 1, working with the school and making sure the best thing for Billie is what is being carried out and put first. Who knows what the future holds? I would never have predicted Billie to settle and enjoy school as much as she does never mind the progress she has made. We are currently in the process of setting her up with an AAC so that could have a huge positive impact on her which could change the whole trajectory of her future.

So my advice to all you parents who may in a similar position to me is just to breathe, take a step back and try and come up with a basic plan. If the school is asking you to carry out tasks such as look at other school options, then do it, even if you don’t agree or want it. If you make sure you have done all you’ve been asked and covered all bases, then nobody can come back at you. If you feel passionate that the school are not making the right choices for your child, speak up! Let your opinions be heard. You are the parents and although we don’t have much say about our children’s education, you do know your child best and your opinions matter! Do what you can and then just take each day as it comes. Try and come up with back up plans so you’re prepared for any situation that may appear in the future. I know you may feel its easy for me to say as Billies enjoys school and I know a lot of SEN parents are in the opposite situation with their child and each day is a struggle, but I do get how you feel – I have been there. Billie hated her previous school, so I do get it! But please just know, you are not alone! My inbox is always open, even if its just to listen. The education system for our children is flawed and only we know how this feels. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look at though much is going to change in the near future, so as parents, we have to ensure we are doing all that we can for our kids, especially if nobody else is.

……. And for those of you that need to hear this today, you’ve got this! You’re incredible and you can do it! Don’t give up- have a cry and a scream if you need to but then just take a step back to basics and carry on. It is hard but the fight, is worth it for out children.

Speak soon, xo