The system is broken.

We need your help.

This wasn’t my planned blog for this week but as some of you may have seen the viral clip that has circulated this week with Warwickshire County Council discussing SEND provision within schools in their county but also, around the UK. For those of you who haven’t seen the clip, you could probably find it anywhere on any social media platforms but here is a brief summary.

In the meeting they were discussing the cost of SEND Provision in schools and some of the comments that were made by 3 councillors in particular are just wrong. Not only were our children referred to as ‘them’ consistently throughout the meeting but by their facial expressions, body language and laughter, it is clearly a joke to them that our children are being let down countless times throughout their academic ages by these people who are supposed to have our children’s best interests. Other comments such as, “SEND wasn’t a thing when I was at school”, “ why is it increasing, is there something in the water”, blaming bad parenting, saying that a child doesn’t have SEND- they are just badly behaved, referring to the days where child who have needs the same as ours were sent to institutions as though that was the right thing and so on and so forth. There are plenty more disgusting & disturbing comments that were made but I will leave that to you to go and watch the clip in question.

These people have chosen a career path which involves having the ability to care, to have compassion and to want to make change for the better. However, these people have qualities that are quite the opposite. To suggest that our children would be better in an institution like in the 1950’s is nothing short of inhumane. In those institutions, children who had SEND such as ASD, ADHD and speech delay were taken away from their homes, family & friends, rejected from society and tied up to radiators, put in stray jackets and beaten as they were deemed to be naughty, strange, a burden on society and worthless.

My daughter and all other children with SEND are NONE of these things. She is beautiful, funny, affectionate, smart and above all, a human being! Not an animal, not a criminal- an innocent 4 year old child. For anyone to decide what she is capable of in the future before she is even given any opportunity to decide for herself is not worthy to be in the presence of my daughter.

Children with any kind of additional needs or disability DO NOT  choose to be that way. They are born they way they are born. It is not down to bad parenting or disobedience. A strict correctional facility will not “sort them out”. They are beautiful, creative, imaginative, caring people who see the world in a much better light than most of us. They are naive but in the best way, they are innocent, they are pure and 10 times the person each one of those councillors are. I’m glad Billie is too naive to know that people like that walk this earth. SEND children are not here for anyone to sit and judge them or discriminate against them.

Why are people so scared of different?

How are those who have power the most uneducated?

How is this happening in 2024??

People often think that I’m exaggerating or wanting sympathy when I talk about our SEND story or share moments of our life with them but when I talk about the fight we face each and every day and will do for the rest of Billies life, this is what I am referring too. The ignorance of people. The fact that those in power and have such a strong influence on our children’s futures are the leading ignorance. These “professionals” sat in a room, discussing our children knowing they were being recorded and said these horrendous comments. It makes you wonder what they are saying without the cameras. The money that goes into educating our children IS NOT a bottomless pit. Our children are entitled to an education just like everyone else. Yes, that education may look slightly different than other children’s but that does not mean it is wrong, a waste or unjustified.

How am I supposed to get Billie all she needs and deserves in her life when these are the people in charge of that. It shouldn’t be this hard! They are deemed failures before they are even given the chance to strive. I will continue to do anything & everything that I can to help make the change, raise awareness and ensure that these narrow minded people do not overshadow the good work that is being put into SEND provision. Yes, we have moved on and we are making progress with inclusion for our children BUT there is so much more work that needs to be done and this just highlights it. We are still so far from where we need to be, there is so much more education that needs to be put out into the world, more change to be done in society as well as in health care and education and it needs to be implemented from the bottom to the very top. These people do not deserve to be in such a position and hold such power. Parents all over the UK are struggling every single day. We are fighting for a school place, fighting for their child’s basic needs to be met, fighting other people’s judgements, fighting for a diagnosis and acknowledgment and all we want is the best for our children just like every other parent. This situation just proves that the only people you can count on to do the best for your child is yourself. It can be isolating, heartbreaking, lonely, overwhelming, exhausting, confusing and the list goes on & on. For every single ounce of joy we get from raising these incredible humans and the having honour to be chosen to do it, we are constantly being pushed down and let down from those around us. This, unfortunately, is just one incident of so so many happening every single day up and down the country. Thousands of SEND children missing out on school every single day because there isn’t a place for them. Mainstream school can not meet their needs and there are not enough SEN schools available. How is this happening in todays day and age in the UK? We are supposed to be one of the most powerful, leading and modern countries in the world yet, the ones in power are letting down thousands of children every single day. There are not more SEND kids now than 30 years ago, we are just better at recognising it & diagnosing it. These problems have always been there but parents are now choosing not just accept it and go away be silent. We are making a stand for our kids!

So, now more than ever, PLEASE do continue to learn, educate, raise awareness, ask questions, sign the petitions and stand up from what’s right. It’s not about if it affects YOUR life personally, it’s about what is right and what is wrong. We are a minority and we need help.

Thank you for your ongoing support but the battle is just beginning.

Please do tag, share, subscribe, follow and anything else you can do to support the SEND community.

Speak soon, xo

Instagram: @parentingautism1